Pics & Update

Here are some pics from Kellen's adventures at OCS.

Kellen's meeting with the OCS leaders went very well. Everyone respected his decision to pursue becoming a chaplain and think it suits his personality very well. He got to meet one-on-one with the chaplain there. It was insightful for him to get an inside point of view and some knowledge about what to expect so far as the process goes.

For now, we're praying and learning all we can about the process, and knowing what's required, etc. It looks like our next steps are finding a seminary, and becoming "members" of our church and really getting involved there, talking to the pastor about the process, etc, since an endorsement from him is required.

It's been great already to have Kellen home. He's more relaxed than I've seen him in the last months- my husband is back. So far we're relaxing and eating junk food :) That will end on Monday. Back to healthy food, and work for me.

We appreciate you keeping us in your prayers, we'll let you know as things develop.

Coming Home

I just got off the phone with Kellen. Among other things he said, "It's over. Come pick me up after work." I'll know more when I pick him up and hear all about the decision, etc, but all I know is that he's coming home and we feel like it's the best thing, the right choice. I know he'll be taking it easy for at least a week, relaxing and letting his body recover from all he's been thru. We'll keep you posted about what's to come, etc as we find out.

Thanks again for all your prayers and encouragement over the past few weeks. Life would've been impossible without them.

A Bit of News

I just got an email from Kellen's OSO (recruiter) in Raleigh. Here it is:

"I heard that Lake may be having concerns at training. I would suggest that he sticks it out until the last week of training. Please reassure him that OCS is not the "Fleet Marine Corps"; he does not have to choose infantry as his job. OCS is a stressful training environment. He can choose the job of comptroller and be a finance officer, he can choose logistics and be in charge of moving supplies from base to base. He will have more then 20 choices while he is at TBS. He can put infantry last, if he does not want to be on the "front line".
I think that he will make a great officer; he just has a few more weeks. Don't let him doubt himself."

So, I'm left to assume that that means he hasn't been dropped, and they're holding onto him at least til the boards on week 9, (Mar 9). They'll reevaluate him then and make the decision of whether he should continue til the end, only days before graduation, Mar 20. I don't think Kellen will DOR (drop on request) because he doesn't want to cheat God. It took a lot for him to get into this session, and he wants to see it as far thru as he can go, which may be til the end. And God only knows, whether this is still the path He has for us.

I have to admit I'm less than thrilled. It seemed like this door was closing, and the chaplain thing was taking off. I was so looking forward to having him home so soon, but I guess God isn't quite done with Kellen there at OCS, and me here. I should still be able to see him for liberty on the weekends, and I'll be sure to post more if/when he writes, or after our visit.

Your continued prayers mean more and more every day. And apparently it really isn't time to stop those encouraging letters to Kellen :) So, thanks for keeping them coming- he'll probably need them more than ever to get thru to the end.

Final Libo??

Kellen had a hard week being platoon leader. Giving the march cadence proved a most difficult task, getting the timing of the steps right, as well as giving orders. He was quite horse from yelling all week. The evaluators say that because he stumbles over his words it seems like he lacks confidence; which isn't really the case, he always stumbles over his words. They also say he needs to be more forceful/mean when giving orders, so there's never a doubt about who's in charge. He also didn't use the "chain of command" efficiently, opting to do things himself, when he should have ordered someone else to do it. On the positive side, they say he has the best integrity/morals of the group. He's the least selfish and has a lot of heart (which is probably why he's not mean!). Also, on PT and academics he's done quite well.

It looked like Kellen was going in to be dropped today (Monday). He had a meeting scheduled to talk with the folks who make that decision this morning. I haven't heard anything, so I don't know what's up. It could be that they've decided to drop him, but want to wait til the end of the pay period (this Friday) for convenience's sake... or they may have just given him a stern talking to and told him to buck up and act like a Marine and didn't drop him at all. Another possibility is that since his knee infection (cellulitis) was acting up they could be holding him to treat that before sending him home. All I know is he hasn't called so he isn't officially coming home yet. Hopefully, I'll get a note or a call by week's end and can update you.

Know that Kellen and I have been in fervent prayer throughout the process, but especially in the past couple of weeks, wondering if him being an officer was truly what God had for us. It seems like if he's dropped this will be a clear-cut answer. Since a few weeks into OCS God seemed to put into Kellen's heart the idea of his becoming a chaplain. That's a whole new, long process, so keep us in prayers concerning wisdom in that area, and also for Kellen's knee to heal up completely and quickly.

I asked Kellen if he was disappointed not to complete the whole session of OCS, and he said, "Not really." He's tired and I guess we both feel that perhaps the time he's had there has served it's greater purpose, which hasn't necessarily been to make him into an officer, but into a man who can sympathize a bit with men in the military and be able to minister to them more effectively. Whatever the reason(s), God's plan is perfect and we don't doubt that Kellen was meant to be at OCS. No matter the outcome, whether he's home this weekend, or if they hold onto him and offer him a commission, we trust in God's wisdom and know that He'll make our path clear, so that as long as we seek to do His will, He will guide us to it.

Thanks again for your encouraging letters to Kellen- they've really helped keep him going over the past weeks. It isn't for sure over yet, so don't hold off on sending one if you're inclined. I'll let you know as soon as I know anything new.

Libo 3 and Letters

What a wonderful break this libo was! Kellen was free at 1:30pm on Sat and he didn't have to be back until 6pm on Sun! Kellen's aunt and uncle were out of town, but we were still able to make use of their fine home as usual. We were sorry to miss them, but it was such a luxury to be selfish with one another and not share :) We did skype with his parents both days, and it was great for them to catch us up on what's going on in Brazil, as well as for them to see Kellen in much better spirits from their first skype visit 2 weeks ago. Things are beginning to settle into routine a bit I guess. Kellen knows more about what's the be expected; the instructors are easing up and treating them more "humanely". There's still yelling when you mess up, etc, but most of the candidates are a bit immune to it; you take the yelling, and the assigned essay and learn that lesson- don't take it to heart and let it break you down.

Kellen spent plenty of time studying and writing essays for the week ahead, and had me help him with studying. It's not very romantic, I know, but it's time spent together, and it's a way I can actually help him aside from praying and bringing food. As always the food part played a large role. I brought up a fav of his, fried chicken with rice and beans (Brazilian). I kept the chocolate/peanut butter dessert theme going, with much success. The only time I seem to cook these days is right before I head up to VA :) I also got to whip up a nice, big breakfast with pancakes and sausage on Sunday morning. Those meals, plus eating at a great burger joint (Five Guys) and Pizza Hut made for a very filling weekend.

I was blessed to have Monday off, so I spent one more night in VA and made the drive back refreshed this morning.

Pray extra hard for Kellen this week. Mon-Thurs he is his platoons leader. He's responsible for letting his men know what they'll need, when they'll go places and then walking them there, commanding the march, etc. He admits that the verbal aspect is not his strong suit; the instructors call him out on that regularly for stuttering or stumbling over his words. He knows what and how to say things, but once he gets to where he needs to say it they get kind of mixed up and he struggles with it. I'm sure they're hoping to use this as a time to drill the importance of getting it right. And with the march he has to wait for the right beat to give commands, and that's kind of a musical rhythmic thing, which is also not his strength. So keep him prayed up! The best thing is, Kellen isn't afraid to try. He volunteers to ask questions when he and the other candidates are talking, because they're hesitant to do it. He knows the worst the instructors can do is yell and assign an essay, and he can survive that. I think he's brave to go out on a limb like that, but he'll improve with practice I know. They're limited to 2 essays (max) a week, so far he's meeting that quota, sometimes the essays go to the next week if he's assigned a 3rd in a week.

Kellen is half-way done. He just started week 6 of 10. There's another "board" where they evaluate the candidates on week 7 and 9. He's testing well physically and academically, so it's still looking good. God has been very faithful to us and blessed Kellen with some great friends. He realized that he is surrounded to the left and right, and his bunk mate as well, by men who were already in the Marines before OCS. He said, "No wonder I look so bad at inspection!" But, they really have helped him in getting his gear as it should be, etc. These priors are full of info and understand a lot of what's required of them without it being explained since it's all part of the military lifestyle that Kellen didn't really possess.

His knee seems to be mostly healed up, and doesn't bother him too much. He's still on antibiotics, and once they run out he goes back to sick bay for a check up to make sure he's all healed up.

I'll conclude with a couple letters from last week. Thanks again for your letters and prayers- they're VERY encouraging!

Letter1- Monday, Feb 9
Guess what- I have another essay to write!!
Today was a PT crazy day. First we had a test on uniforms (boring). Then, we got ready and ran the O-course, ran 880 sprints (half a mile) then ran in circles screaming and doing push-ups or star-jumps, etc. After that we went on a 3 mile hike to take our land nav class. After which we had to hike back, so I'm beat.
I love you. Hope you're happy.

Letter2- Tuesday, Feb 10
I have another essay to do. But I passed my 5 mile run 36:53 and I passed my 3 mile run in boots in 23:00. Running up huge hills in boots sucks! I hate it. But I lived. This week has been PT hell. OH! We did the Quigly {a big swampy area with obstacles} and had to break the ice to get into it. But it wasn't that bad.
I need to write an essay on belligerence, because I smiled and rolled my eyes.
I'm so exhausted- everyone is. The reason we only had one test is because this week is super PT week.
Can't wait to see you. Love you with all my heart.

Libo 2

Here's how Kellen looked just before he headed back over the bridge he hates so much! He is a sight to behold in his utilities :) The red emblems aren't part of the usual get-up, but for the past few days he'd been serving as (I think) squad leader. He was ready to pass along that duty, as the instructors' eyes are always on you and the possibility for getting grilled is greatly increased... a bit more stressful than normal.

As I was about to head out for this weekend I checked the mail, just to make sure Kellen hadn't sent a letter with any last minute requests... and sure enough he had! He wanted 2 peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, chips and peanut butter brownies. I told him the week before about the PB brownies I was planning on bringing, so they were ready, all I had to do was run back to the apt and make the PB&J's and stop off at a mart for the chips!

He had first firewatch, so he got out a bit after 8pm, and was a very happy camper with his goodies! We went out to Chili's and had a nice meal to celebrate our anniversary. After stopping off at an ice cream shop we headed on to Tony and Melody's where we were able to spend our first night together since he left a month ago. Never has the sound of him snoring been so sweet. We had to be up early so he could be in formation at 8am.

I was able to pick him back up around 10:30, but he wasn't allowed to leave base! I dropped him at the base McD's where he could study and write some essays while I drove back to Tony & Melody's to pick up our things. We spent the rest of the afternoon with each other. We found a neat little restaurant called "Quantico Deli Fried Chicken". It's owned by a Korean lady and they had some familiar looking Korean dishes- it was like stepping back into Korea! They even had kimchi, for which Kellen was very happy :P I'd forgotten how bad kimchi breath is! It was a very pleasant day, so we found a park with a picnic table where we could sort out and organize his clothes that I'd thrown in the duffel at Tony & Melody's.

Our time was drawing to a close since (due to being in sick bay for his knee) he had a test to make up. So around 3:45 I dropped him off, with "orders" to be back at 5:30 with supper. As soon as he finished his test last week he was free to leave, and so we missed out on about an extra hour of time together since I left after dropping him off for the test. This time I waited and even though he finished his test in 20 mins, he had to wait until the last person finished testing, arriving at the car at 6:20. He was so upset, as he only had about 10 minutes to squeeze in one last visit and scarf down his supper. The time we get to spend together go a long way to get him through the week, remembering the good time we had, and looking forward to the next liberty. Missing out on times like that really weigh on him and he was really discouraged, painfully aware of the time missed together when I was mere yards away; it's just the kind of thing that brings it all to a head and makes him want to drop, all the while knowing that through all the suffering, he's right where God wants him. In his last letter he wrote:
"I felt like crap this morning. I wanted to drop, but I didn't want to cheat God. He got me here. If He doesn't want me to finish we'll work it out. I just don't like all the pressure. But I feel fine now. The story of OCS, high highs, low lows."

It goes without saying that your prayers are a tremendous support to him. Knowing that he has people at home thinking about him and praying for him really helps bolster him through the week, especially when times seem their bleakest. The instructors are supposed to treat the candidates more "like humans" soon, knowing that the finest of the crop is remaining, and they simply need to do mold them into officers, while continuing to weed out the weakest leaders, etc.

He should also get to talk with someone about his MOS (Military Occupation Specialty, or job). This will give him some idea of what he wants to do in the military, should they select him as an officer. He would like God's guidance in that area. He'd originally thought about MP, but while being there he's thinking about being a chaplain... which isn't a position for an officer... so be in prayer about what it is God wants him to do. He wants to be faithful to whatever God's will is, but he is really hating the separation factor, and so am I. So, hopefully God is able to lead us to something where he's not away so much, with training that will include me moving with him... but that's up to Him.

The OCS site has new pics, but I didn't spot him in them. It's still good to be able to see what he was camping and hiking through. Here are a couple from the 4 mile hike they had in week 3.
Kellen wanted me to be sure and say "Thanks" for your letters. They are a great encouragement during the week, and he is happily the recipient of many a letter- so Thank You!!! If you haven't written, but want to be a part of the encouragement, here's the address once again. Thanks again for all the prayers and notes!

Candidate Lake, Kellen, K. 1252

OCS, C Company, 2nd Platoon

2189 Elrod Ave

Quantico, VA 22134-5033

Quick Letter

A quick one from Kellen.

Tuesday, Feb 3:
"I got some letters, so I figured I better write. I need to study, so I'll make this quick.

On Monday we went out to the field in tents. It sucked, but we only had to take them down once! I scored a 92% on my retake test. I also aced my "night land" nav eval. Finally, I missed only one question on SuleI which is about a 98.5%. Good huh?

Well, after all that though, I had to go see the Corpsman and that's where I got blasted! I got put on SIQ (sick in quarters) so my instructors are ticked at me! So, I'm getting yelled at at every turn.

But it's ok with me. I got a ton of letters and I feel much better. I'll keep giving my all and see what God does.

Off to the books!

xoxo

First Liberty Weekend

I headed up to VA Sat, and arrived mid afternoon. I got to spend some time with Kellen's aunt and uncle who live in Fredericksburg, only about 20mins from the base. Around 7:30 Kellen called and told me to meet him at the McDonald's on base. I drove as fast as I reasonably could and made excellent time! It was SO great to see him and hug him, etc.

He was very lively and told me tons of stories, etc. He had an infection in his knee (cellulitis) which had him in the sick bay and in quarters for 2 days. When he originally went to sick bay he thought this was it for him, because for most candidates cellulitis is not a quick fix and they get sent home, but God pulled him through again and he's still there hanging on. But- because of this he was put on "light duty" for his platoon's duty, which basically meant he didn't do anything, but show up for the platoon guard switch. So, the cellulitis was a blessing in disguise since it gave him a couple days to relax, and then for liberty he had more freedom to spend time with me.

We spent Sat pm eating. How typically Kellen :) He'd already eaten 2 sandwiches and a sundae at McD's when I got there. I'd made cookies and banana bread, which he ate half of before we headed to Domino's (also on base!) and devoured most of a large pizza. We then did some shopping for some supplies he needed and hung out and studied in the car, as everything seems to shut down at 10pm.

He headed back to his barracks at midnight, and I headed to Tony & Melody's. I got to the gate I entered base through only to find it closes at 9:30pm!!! I knew there was another gate somewhere. Based on some lodging info I'd heard about earlier, and seen a sign for, I managed to find my way to it after some earnest prayers concerning sleeping in the car...

I picked Kellen up on Sun at 8:15am and he was free to leave base! We headed to Tony & Melody's where I fixed him a feast of a breakfast, did some laundry, helped quiz him for tests he's studying for, etc. It was SO wonderful to be able to spend so much time with him off base, even if we were studying and preparing him for the week ahead. It was a real blessing to both of us, a refresher, and makes us all the more anxious for the next weekend!

When it came time to leave we went out to the car only to find the battery dead. I'd left the lights on (my warning bell wasn't working, and I was distracted getting out of the car, etc!!). Luckily, Tony had some jumper cables, so in a matter of minutes he jumped us off and we were on our way. We still had time to do a bit more shopping at the PX and made it to the drop off with time to spare.

It wasn't easy saying goodbye again, but we both rest in knowing God will take care of each of us until we get to see one another THIS weekend. It's our anniversary on Sunday, so we're really hoping and praying that it works out for him to be able to stay off base. He has some buddies who are willing to work with him and make it so he won't have the night shift so he can stay at Tony & Melody's. What a blessing that is! Hopefully it all works out- I almost feel bad asking God for that because he provided us with so much time together this past weekend, a full week or more before we'd even hoped to see each other. But I'm asking largely, that my "joy may be full!"

Kellen seemed to be in fairly good spirits for someone going through this process. He's tired and hungry most days, and is always stressed about having things in their place and remembering the proper ways to do this and that, as well as all the tests academically. Keep him in your prayers; he really values them, and so do I!

Pre-Libo letters:

Letter 1: Wednesday, Jan 28

"A lot has happened since the last time I wrote. I am currently writing this in a hospital bed with an IV in my arm. I have an infection in my knee. So I am sleeping, writing essays and hanging out. I hope I don't get kicked out, but God's will be done. Sunday was by far the worst day of OCS. They had us do tons of games. We cleaned the "house" like 50 times. I was missing you so much. It was all I could do to stay motivated.

On Sun-Mon night we had to pack for a camping trip and 3-4mile hike with a 70 lb pack on our backs. On top of that we had a test on Monday. So, I spent 2.5 hours packing in the dark, another 1 hr on fire watch and final 2 hours studying. I failed the test, but hey my bag was packed. (Lesson learned on that one). From now on tests come first for this guy.

On Monday I failed the test and we all walked around with those packs on for hours. Around 3 we all got together and went for a hike to our camping site. The sire was about a mile out. Once we arrived, the games began. We had to make our tent and take it down 3 times. It sucked! After that we got to eat MRE's. It was dark so I didn't even know how to eat them. But, I figured it out. Now that I think about it, I haven't eaten a hot meal since Sunday evening! I am SOOO hungry!

On Tuesday we got to sleep in til 5:30. It was awesome!Then we took down our tents and had another MRE. I got Tuna mmm... but it had peanut M&M's so I was happy! Plus I didn't have to open anything to heat it, that's a pain. After that we went on our 4 mile march. It was ok, quite long and cold. It was the day that it snowed about 4". All the while we were walking though it. After that we had practice fire team scenario we got to play out. Basically you give commands and attack a yellow box (in the snow). After that we had a MRE. Then went to the leadership course. Remember those videos with candidates doing things with ammo cans? Problem solving. I had a really tough one but I passed it. I also passed the compass test! That stupid written test is what killed me!

The Corpsmen (nurses) are AWESOME! They've been very kind and helpful, gone way out of their way to help me. I have been in sick bay since 5:30. I am going to get another IV which will last another 4-5 hours, so I'll be bored and hanging out. Prayer requests are pretty straight forward. I'll be up on my feet, best case, 3 days. I miss you and can't wait to see you!

Letter 2: Thursday, Jan 29

"I'm still in sick bay. I have cellulitus, which is basically an infection. They say my knee is full of puss (Gross.). It's pretty painful, but at least I' not missing any test of events today. I'm a little worried about libo, but I'm sure we'll be able to see each other at some point. It sounds like you'll be able to come pick me up where I dropped me off. So that's cool. My knee is so swollen and sore. I am having mixed emotions. Does this mean God wants me to do something else, or does it men He wants me to stay? My only thing that bugs me is the amount of time away from loved ones, like you.

I received your letters What a blessing it is to hear from you. It always makes me feel much better. I've lost more weight. I'm down to 222 lbs. Only another 14 to go! I was up til 12:00+ last night taking notes from my "knowledge" book. You're not allowed to study unless everyone else can. So, I took a lot of notes so I can review them now in the hospital bed. Once we meet up I'm going to have some errands for you to do. I'll have you make copies of a 5 paragraph order, shrink them and laminate them. I know, a lot of work, but I need it. This is assuming everything goes through and I don't get DQed. I have a real peace about it though. God is in control; whatever happens we'll always be happy together. Maybe God wants me to open a gym once you make me rich from the book. HAHA! Wouldn't that be the life? ou writing books, me a physical trainer (I don't want to own a gym, too much work), and babies. I believe I can miss 5 straight days before I get DQed, so this is day 2.

Your letters are so busy. I'm glad to hear it. Once the weekend is here we can see each other once a week then it's all down hill from there. I only have one more essay to write this week. I finished my 1st one in this bed. I came prepared today.

I love you! See you soon!

Letter 3: Thursday, Jan 29

It's still Thursday. I'm back from sick bay. My status is SIQ (sick in quarters). I have to lay in bed and do nothing. I can't even study because that would be an integrity violation. It looks like my leg will get better and I'll be able to push through. I shouldn't be writing you. I should sleep, but I have the time. Once libo hits, it's ON! Since we're duty plt, we each have 3 hr shifts. I don't know when mine will be on Saturday. I hope it's either really early or late, that way we can be together longer. On Sunday, we only have fire watch, so we'll see how that goes. But the week after that it'll only be fire watch! So, we'll be able to hang out at Tony and Melody's.

I'm soooo hungry all the time. When you report to sick bay all you get is an MRE. Then you have to wait and hope the chain of command knows you're in sick bay and sends food. I didn't get fed until 14:30, breakfast was at 5:30. That's a long stinking time.

Tomorrow morning is inspection. I hope and pray I'm in sick bay when that goes down, that way I'll miss it. I can't get out of bed, so my locker is crap. My Corpsman (Amaya)said he'd keep me as long as he could, so that's pretty cool of him. I'm craving a pizzahut meatlovers with that monster crust or whatever it's called. That sounds sooo good. Oh, I keep getting off topic. An inspection is when you have to have everything put away in a certain place and size. ex: 3 boot socks, bi-fold, toes facing inboard (PUKE). Then, you have to put all you 782 gear on your bunk in a special little magical order. Then you stand at attention and get yelled at. ex: "Your breath stinks... you need to find the cat that crapped down your throat and KILL IT!" Fun, huh?

I got a chit yesterday. Chits are pieces of paper that say "favorable" (I don't know why, that one is never checked), "marginal" and "unfavorable". I received "unfavorable" because I failed to place my locker on zero... zero! zero! (They think they're funny). I can't wait to mess with them once I'm a Lt. I have so many questions, like, "What do you think..? How much can you bench press?...I need a 300 word essay on why you're ugly..."

The time is so near to being together. I can't wait to laugh, cry and be with you. Well, I need sleep so I can work through the night. Love you with all my heart. Tell everyone hi and thanks for the prayers.